Better....And Worse

OK, so my back finally got with the program and isn't keeping me awake and night and walking like friggin' Frankenstein during the day. That's all well and good. But I found myself slipping into a bit of a funk earlier in the week (actually, it was one hell of a funk) and although I feel fine physically, my head is a mess.

I don't really talk much about it anymore (since I'm not really sure what the point would be if I did), but I still find myself thinking about how my life took a drastic and unplesant change at the begining of this year. And that change will necessitate more change in the near future. (I don't expect that to make sense to anyone that doesn't know me or my situation). There are several things about that whole episode that I've dealt with and have become okay with. There are some things that I'm still not okay with. Sometimes it gets hard to deal.

But I wake up everyday and go through my routine as best as I can. I'd like to sit here and think it will get better, but I think that if I don't expect too much, I can't be let down. So I just subscribe to the philosophy that "it is what it is," and maybe, just maybe, I'll get stuff worked out.

Then I stop myself and think about a particular friend of mine who has been extremely supportive of me with all that's gone on. My friend recently lost someone very near and dear to her. Although I feel like I can relate to that, it's a different kind of loss entirely. And her loss is easily a million times bigger than mine. I need to get my head out of my ass and be a better friend to her. She was there for me. I need to be there for her. Last time I checked, that's what friends do for each other, right?

People say "it gets worse before it gets better." I think I've had my fair share of the worse part, and my friend certainly has, too. Time for things to get better.